absences

As I woke up that morning I had a million things on my mind. Such as what should I wear, what's going to happen today, will it be that bad, is this the right decision, etc. Let's rewind. I started this position at the local health department while I was still in school. I have been at this position 2 weeks shy of 1 year. This was my first "real" nursing job. That is so hard to think about. Sometimes I can't believe that it is all real. Ok back to that day.. I kept reverting back to high school on the last day when everyone is so happy to be out of there, but sad that your friends wont be together. My last day of work was uneventful and slightly disappointing. I spent the whole morning giving vaccinations. I have been scarred of giving shots for the last year because your injecting someone with a known substance and hoping nothing will happen. I do not give a lot of shots, but today was the exception. I think I gave over 50 shots that morning. It was a day of a ton of emotions for me and a lot of anxiety of the unknown.

Now that it has been 4 days in my new position at a local hospital, these feelings have faded. As I sit in orientation, working in a hospital it is still so surreal to me. I have never been the person who thought that this was an option for me.  I have not been on the floor yet, everyone during orientation has been super nice. I feel like we have been getting front loaded with a ton of information. I have noticed that just sitting and listening to people talk is more emotionally and physically tiring than being up and mobile. I also find myself constantly being hungry, all i want to do is eat. What I do eat never seems to be enough, which is crazy to me.

Isn't it funny how our bodies respond to stress, anxiety and soemthign new. It amazes me how well things have been going besides being hungry and tired. On the plus side, I am sleeping slightly better and my husband has been home this week (at 4am), but still.

Any strange new changes in your life?